Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Steve Holt!



Good opening salvo in AD's 3rd season. Love the Fonz as the sex freak attorney.

bunny out



ps: Gilomre ep. #2 must see tonight!

87 comments:

Kern said...

Sheriff: I agree.

"Come on Michael, taste the happy!"

"It tastes a lot like the sad."

Kern said...

I am looking quite forward to Gilmores tonight. This new thing with Rory is pretty interesting, as it kind of adds more depth to her character. It really adds a lot when they write her with a few flaws.

krysta jo said...

I figured out my VCR/DVD/Cable dilemma all by myself last night and am now rigged up to tape the episode. Can't wait!!

Kern said...

Right on. Did you watch last weeks?

Damfino said...

I've made the hugest-littlest mistake!

Kern took my favorite line.

TASTE MY SADNESS MICHAEL!!!

Kern said...

"I've got to break down the salad bar and set up the leather pony."

Ain't Right said...

"That's not a Volvo"

Damfino said...

Glad we didn't spring for the color copier.

Kern said...

"I'm Oscar. Dot com!"

krysta jo said...

Wow. Nice.

Kern said...

We're awesome!

Is anyone else looking forward to Scott Baio becoming the new Bluth attorney?

I want Charles in Charge of my case.

Damfino said...

Scott Baio? Did I miss something?

Kern said...

I think I heard from some odd source that Scott Baio was going to be taking over as legal representation sometime this season for the fired Barry Zukerkorn.

Damfino said...

Henry went and joined CBS!!! That is sick and wrong!

Kern said...

Yeah. It is. Dammit.

New Boy In the neighborhood
Lives downstairs and it's understood

Charles in charge of my days and my nights

Charles in charge of our wrongs and our rights

And I want, I want charles in charge of me.


You know, looking at those lyrics now and realizing they were sung by a young sounding girl, I think there was a wee bit of naughty S & M with the Pembroke/Powell clans' girls.

"Who's in charge, Jamie?"
(whip crack)
"You're in charge, Charles! You are!"

Kern said...

Correction: Of course I meant BDSM, since the above scenario also incorporates domination.

Damfino said...

I think you just had a private moment on the blog... and I commend you for it.

Kern said...

A what?

Kern said...

I'm a liberated kind of guy, whatever Charles chooses to do in the privacy of his downstairs apartment is up to him. And I have to say that to a twelve year old kid, Nicole Eggert was tops to be sure. Though as a kid I aimed a little older.

Not like Angela Lansbury older, but like Heather Thomas older, perhaps.

Fall Guy, we hardly knew ye. Sniff.

Damfino said...

Flashes of the opening credits of "Fall Guy" often rummage through my dreams. Something about a hot tub bikini moment...

yummy.

Kern said...

Wow, you too? Man, I thought I was the only one.

Mine is updated a tad to include Heather Thomas as well as the Gilmore Girls.

Pardon me, I have to...um...go to uh...work on the library project.

Yeah, that's it...the library project...

Damfino said...

I have to go apply burn ointment!

Kern said...

Use Sensodyne instead!

Damfino said...

Can't - emptied it on my buttocks earlier this morning.

It has been a long day.

krysta jo said...

GROSS JED

Kern said...

Well at least he said that he emptied it on his buttocks. He could have said he applied it to a far more delicate area.

Kern said...

Actually, maybe it worked its way up come to think of it...

krysta jo said...

I prefer not to think of Jed's delicate areas...

Kern said...

Probably a wise move. You know how sometimes people's ears burn when someone talks about them?

Well at this point Jed's trousers are probably on fire.

krysta jo said...

It's likely. That would be funny to see.

Deit Heimley said...

"I'm not saying your lying, but we do have this video of you with your pants on fire."

My own little TV quote. I thought it appropriate. I got caught up in the excitement, what with the talk of sesodyne and Jed's bum...

Kern said...

And his crotch!

krysta jo said...

Thanks for including that Kern lest we all forget that yes, we were talking about Jed's nether region.

Wow...my day at work just got a whole lot more exciting thanks to the blog.

Damfino said...

Thank god my unmentionables can excite someone.

Deit Heimley said...

Yes, what's up with the "and his crotch" comment Kern. You are not suposed to get excited about Jed's crotch. As the token gay, I fill the role of inapropriately uncomfortable comments about Jed's unmentionable areas.

You just looked a bit too happy to add the crotch assist. Even Jed's going to catch on pretty soon.

krysta jo said...

I think you got a little eager to use that exclamation point Kern. If you had just used a period at the end of your statement, it would have appeared more manly and not so eager to discuss Jed and his special parts.

Deit Heimley said...

It also didn't help that your comment was just over a minute after mine. It made you look too excited to add even more comment on Jed's happy spots.

Damfino said...

I feel fluttery inside... I am not sure how this comment post ventured to this topic - but it is swell!

Kern - exclamate anything you want.

Deit Heimley said...

You see, you made comments quoting AD, which led Kern to ponder your use of burn ointment. Which led --along the lines -- to my questioning of Kern's ponderings about your personal parts.

KJ, did you notice that earlier Kern made two comments bemusedly wondering about Jed aplying sensodine to his private spaces.
hmmmmmm...

All this talk about Jed's ...

I've got to go clean the gutters.

krysta jo said...

"clean the gutters"?? I have never heard it called that before. Unless you mean you really are going to take a gutter cleaner and remove all the leaves from the gutters on your house. Then, I have heard it called that before.

I did notice Kern's new obsession with Jed and his play toys and lotions/cremes. Interesting.

Kern said...

Well, I must say...

First, the exclamation point was for comedic effect.

Secondly, the only reason I was talking about Jed's sensitive areas is because I thought I could earn my first GROSS KERN. Jed gets them often, even the Sheriff scored one once. I thought the topic of Jed's giblets would be enough to finally earn me that honor.

And as far as the manly thing, did anyone not catch the earlier statements regarding Charles in Charge Domination, or a hot tub full of filthy Gilmore goodness?

krysta jo said...

Ok now he is defending himself??

My boyfriend's boss is Charles and they refer to him every day as Charles in Charge because he really is in charge. It makes me giggle.

Kern said...

Speaking of the Girls, I wouldn't mind being the creamy Kern center of a Gilm-oreo cookie.

Yes indeed.

Kern said...

I am only tardy to my own defense because I was hanging pictures in an attorney office for an hour.

krysta jo said...

"hanging pictures" huh?








kidding Kern...

Kern said...

Yes, and I'll have you know that people kept walking by saying, "Hey, Well Hung, Kern!"

krysta jo said...

Wow. Did you forget your pants this morning again? Or are you sporting shorts and no boxers?

Oh you mean "Well Hung" in reference to the picture.

Got it.

Kern said...

Wow, even my vaguely disgusting talk about being part of a Gilmore mother and daughter orgy didn't raise the GROSS alert.

Standards and Practices must be out having a few drinks...

Kern said...

Oh, I was wearing pants. And people were still saying it.












About the pictures, naturally.

Deit Heimley said...

Hmmm... "Hanging pictures" I have never heard it called that before. Unless you mean actually hanging pictures. Then that's pretty gay.

Oh, I took a careful look at your wording there earlier. You never said YOU wanted to whipping the gilmores. You just mentioned CHARLES in the BDSM. You were pretty vague on the details. Was that because you want Charles in charge of your days and nights??

Come on Kern, you are among friends. Admit you want nothing more than to apply soothing burn lotion to Jed's giant kielbasa.

krysta jo said...

Yeah. Come on. Admit it.

Kern - you are trying too hard for the gross comment. And...you aren't accounting for my state of mind and demeanor. Earning a "GROSS JED" is a long lost art that very few men still possess.

Kern said...

Listen. I had to hang the pictures(for real) because we moved an attorney a couple weeks back and no one had put them up. Since guys around here get tap for anything vaguely maintenance related, I had to help hang pictures. There were no window treatements involved. I am saving that for my apartment.

As far as Charles In Charge, I referenced him whipping Jamie, the oldest blonde girl of the Powell household. Hence my saying, "Who's in Charge, Jamie?"

I then went on to talk about Heather Thomas from the Fall Guy and the Gilmores in a hot tub.

Then even more than that, I made a relatively disgusting reference to being a part of a menage a trois with Lauren Graham and Alexis Bledel.

I'm sure there are plenty of gals or guys or someone who are itching to get their hands on Jed's bratwurst. Unfortunately,(or fortunately depending) I am not among that group.

Damfino said...

I think the pinacle of this conversation was when Deit announced hanging pictures is gay.

I am in tears... this is killer stuff.

Frankly, discussing the girls in sexual terms is somewhat bothersome... I look upon Rory as a sister and dear friend. Lorelai on the other hand would make a nice addition to my list o'sex.


An evening of passion... and waffles served off of Pietro - our nude midget.

Kern said...

This has taught me a valuable lesson. I should just be vulgar naturally because there is virtually no way I'll get a GROSS KERN, and end up being accused of being after my good friend's Lucky Charms as it were.

It's really a lose-lose situation.

Damfino said...

Damnit - off to work... Kern - be strong. Hang well.

Deit Heimley said...

You know I kid. Though, when ever Jed meets a gay friend of mine they either are convinced we've dated, or they ask for his number. Jed would get so much action if only he's switch sides. I think it's his macho top attitude.

So it could be worse ... I could be serious.

Though you do give me pause some times.

Kern said...

Jed-Rory as a sister?

Perhaps in the old days. But ever since she did the matress rodeo with Dean, I would say she's flipped the switch and now qualifies as a sexual being. As such, I would like very much to "do her" as the kids say.

And Lorelai too.

Kern said...

I also kid. Plus if Jed would flip, you'd get the China Set!

Deit Heimley said...

Yes!!! I forgot about that. I'd all but given up hope.

krysta jo said...

Wow...there is nothing like reading about naked midgets to make my day better. I love midgets.

Also, I agree with Jed about Deit's gay comment. I was seriously rolling on the floor hugging my sides.

"Mattress rodeo??" I haven't called it that since I was possibly 14.

Kern said...

Well, I was pressed for time. I have a slew of other more descriptive terms for your amusement if you'd rather, however...

Kern said...

All things considered, I think this has been the liveliest thread in a long time. Let's give ourselves a hand.

I meant a round of applause, you bloody perverts.

krysta jo said...

I like to use the term "pounding." It makes me giggle. That and "panties" because it's such a dainty word.

Kern said...

You know what phrase Jed loves?

"Moist Panties"

He LOVES it. Try saying it to him sometime, I guarantee you'll enjoy the reaction.

I rescind me matress rodeo statement. Ever since Dean "pounded" Rory, she's flipped the switch and become a sexual being.

I like the use of pounded now that you mention it.

Deit Heimley said...

Oh, and Kern, I've gotten a GROSS. It's all in just not holding back and being the filthy bastard that you really are. It just takes real filth from the gut (the true home of filth after all).

But you know, maybe someone who frets about taking a fifty he found ON THE SIDEWALK just doesn't have the filth needed in his gut to get a "GROSS KERN" You know in your case, that will be harder because you're trying to cover up that you're gay and you have to add "s" to all your pronouns.

krysta jo said...

No no no. Dean didn't pound Rory - that makes it sound like he gave her a wonky eye like I have.

Dean and Rory pounded.

krysta jo said...

It's a mutual event.

krysta jo said...

And...for the record, I never would kick Dean out of bed for eating crackers. He is just too yummy.

Kern said...

I think it sounds a little nastier if Dean pounded her. They kind of imply that they "made sweet love" but I bet he really gave it to her, and she was walking funny. I bet that's in the outtakes.

Special Feature: Ouch!-Dean Bangs Rory For The First Time From Several Angles With Commentary from Jared Padalecki and Alexis Bledel.

Deit Heimley said...

Girls don't pound. Boys pound. Girls Jump. So you could say, "since Rory jumped Dean..."

I mean if I say, "Kern got pounded by the new attoney while they were 'hanging pictures.'" You get a totally different picture than if I say "The new attorney jumped Kern while they were 'hanging pictures.'"

Kern's delight in using the term "Pounded" is once more revealing Kern's true nature.

Kern said...

Mmm...crackers...

Kern said...

My cracker comment was even funnier following Deit's post.

krysta jo said...

Why is it a guy's fantasy that the girl walks funny for days after a pounding encounter? I have yet to actually meet a girl who has had that happen. If you cause a girl to walk funny, you aren't doing something right. Try again.

Kern said...

And for the record, the attorney is not new, and was nowhere near his office at the time.

And I only thought the pounding sounded good when it was Dean pounding Rory.

Mmm...crackers.

krysta jo said...

Good call on the pounding/jumping distinction Deit.

Kern said...

Well, you'd have to ask Dean about his technique. I wasn't there in the room at the time.

krysta jo said...

Wow - was he nowhere near his office? Did he perhaps join you in the supply closet while you had to get "supplies" to hang the picture?

Kern said...

Well, you'd have to ask Dean about his technique. I wasn't there in the room at the time.

krysta jo said...

Did you just double post?

Kern said...

He was in a meeting with other attorneys.

Although, I guess it might have been nice if some hot brunette woman came in, completely turned on by my attempt at manual labor and JUMPED me.

Kern said...

What?

Kern said...

What?(Part Deux)

Deit Heimley said...

Well, I have know of a guy who walked funny after an all night session, but then this was after several guys in a row, and involved toys and slings and other Scott Baio associate paraphanalia. Or at least that's what he claimed. I wasn't there, so for all I know his had may have just slipped while doing some wood burning.

Oh, and I don't know much about boy/girl sex, but from what little I know, (and it's still probably more than Kern) the guy has a hammer and he pounds it around down there for a few seconds while the girl jumps around trying to get him to hit the right spot. That's why there's a distinction between the two.

Kern said...

Deit, you're sadly correct about having a better working knowledge of the heterosexual mating experience than I do.

Now please excuse me while I stab myself in the ear repeatedly with a letter opener.

Goodnight Kern, you virginal Pollyanna, you.

Kern said...

Perhaps someone should draw me a picture, too, since I will not likely ever see the thing done from my point of view.

Deit Heimley said...

You see, now in Seattle, with your soft features, dry wit, and love of interior decorating, you would have no trouble finding a date if you switched sides. The gays would accept your all-too-nice neurosis, and even girls would like you more.

Just a thought to send you sadly on your way.

Kern said...

Thanks Deit! By the way, reviews will most likely not be until later this week.