Monday, June 27, 2005

When does a man stop thinking about how he would taking a cop's gun whenever he sees one?

Is it just me? Everytime I see a police officer I think about how, if needed, I would go about disarming and apprehending the officer's weapon. This may sound truly bizarre to the ladies of Damfinoblog, but guys back me up here. Does this not enter your mind? If at all costs you must remove that weapon, how do you go about doing it? What's it going to take? What approach will you use? This is what I wonder if I ever will stop considering. There are others too. Let's leave that for later for I'm sure this will cause enough uproar.

43 comments:

krysta jo said...

urnotme -- I would suggest my new favorite move in this situation (which oddly enough, I have pondered as well - that's what you get for dating a cop).

Kick him in the shins while punching him in the nose.

Deit Heimley said...

Is that with or without getting the crap beat out of you after you get the gun? You know, at close range, a gun is not nearly as effective as a nightstick.

Equally important, is this from any cop, fresh out of the academy and 55 year old incompetent leuitentent alike, or the stereotypical donut eating fat cop? This is important because most new recuits are pretty buff (many just out of military service) and trained in hand-to-hand combat. So I mean, you could get the gun away from him, but that doesn't mean you will be able to do anything with it.

Also, is this in a crowd of cops, or is this some lonely guy walking scared down a dark alley in typical horror movie fashion. Cause I mean if the guy has a partner, getting the gun from the first guy will get you shot by his partner.

Finally, what type of gun is he carrying. Many police departments allow their cops to choose their own hand gun, and some guns are better to grab than others. Some guns have a different saftey configuration.

We need details Urnotme. Set the senario for us if you will.

Kern said...

You know the "Hey, look over there!" method? Not so effective.

Kern said...

A short addendum: I kid. The only trouble I've had with the police were two traffic stops, and I got warnings.

I've never personally been too curious about how to disarm an officer. They would beat the stuffing out me.

urnotme said...

Good questions. I will get on them, but mostly this- Today I was at QT and there was a cop there (30-35) being a dick with one of the clerks about something and it crossed my mind as it always does when I happen to be standing by one or one walks by. I think about the quickest way to get his weapon be it his gun, nightstick or even taster and I feel I have it down pat. Not that I ever fully expect it to happen, but if need be I think I would have a leg up on others due to my constant analyzation of it. It's not that I want to get the gun and kill him, it's I want to help defuse a situation or help others against a dirty (or whatever) cop.

This same thing goes for like bridges. Have you ever found yourself standing or driving over one thinking hey what's it going to be like if I jump over and land in the water.. or drive off the road at 65.. what's going to happen to the car? How much air will I get. Now I don't want you all to get the wrong Idea. I don't want to kill myself or anything like that at ALL. It's just these random things that I find myself pondering more and more. Like at a funeral or bookstore or somewhere else quiet and you think about yelling out some random offensive thing. What's going to be the reaction?

You know what I mean?

Deit Heimley said...

Um... Not to worry the Damfino readers here, but this is classic antisocial behavior. Some serial killers also wonder about these sorts of things. We all think of the sexual predator serial killers like Dahmer or Bundy, but remember leopold and lobe and a slew of others whose names I cannot remember now. They thought of killing as a challenge.

I see a slightly paranoid streak here too mixed with a hero-complex. I mean why would you expect a cop to be dirty, and why would you think you are the best person to defuse the situation?

As for the car off a bridge going 65 ... you die. That's what happens. The physics of the crash are not that pretty. Basically, that is the worst sort of crash you can have, and cars are not designed to withstand that type of pressure. Most people in a car that plundges into water die.

seriously

Damfino said...

I must admit that I am thorougly disturbed by this entire post. Wow - I often wondered what lurked in the mind of the other world... the crazy violent one.

No - I don't think about disarming cops... in fact, I dislike even seeing the weapon. I mostly block the entire violent concept from my mind... meaning that I want to do my best to not even acknowledge that the weapon exists... and could be used to do harm.

Spose that would make me a victim... but it sure has kept me out of trouble this far.

As far as driving your car off a bridge... never been up for that either. I often think of jumping off the bridge to swim... but not really to destroy the car and endanger my life.

Are you taking your meds today?

urnotme said...

lmao
seriously
are you comparing me to a serial killer?!

like i said these are just random thoughts

like movie thoughts

what happens will you pull your car off the road at 65 and start "mudding" over the terain.... i didn't mean take the car over the bridge.. i meant physically jump with ur body of the bridge

and like i said
im not going to do it
they are thoughts

and i think everyone at one time or another think of them

r u man enough to admit it?

it's all in fun

Food for thought

seriously

urnotme said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
QueenB said...

Wow! Im scared.

Damfino said...

Hmmm... ok. Random thoughts....

Well - I had some naughty random thoughts whilst at the water park on Saturday.

Um. I often think about shaving Josh's head while he sleeps.

Not really and massively violent thoughts...

Kern said...

While I don't personally think about these things, it seems to me that Urnotme is indulging in nothing more than a little harmless hypothesizing.

So far I think I like KJ's response the best, I must say. Is anyone posting in the earlier threads by the way, or should I just camp here the rest of the afternoon?

Deit Heimley said...

As Damfino has often said. I am a bastard. Yes, my mother and father were not married when I was born (early 70s and not that uncommon), but also I am a cruel and evil man who enjoyed the thought of really pissing off Urnotme (who often goes around in a fit of mild rage as it is).

And that is my random thought. How can I use my vastly superior brain to play god today?

Oh, and cars flip really easily in uneven terrain at high speed. Even a small bit of sideways slippage in your tire and flip your car. I tell stories of the time I saw a geo metro barely swerve to avoid a road hazard only to see the car tumble down a steep embankment like something off a bad movie. Though I did find out that day that modern cars do not explode when they tumble down an embankment. There is a little shutoff device that stops that from happening. That is, as long as the fuel tank in not punctured, and in most cars that is very hard to do even the most severe crash.

urnotme said...

who often goes around in a fit of mild rage as it is---WHAT!?

You are all missing the damn point.. well except for Kern. Oh and KJ.

SO that leaves Jed and Derek that can't see the light. You guys are off the hook. They were just random random thoughts. Get an effin' grip and try and use some of that 'extra' brain power mommy always said you had extra of because you were special.

and from one bastard to another check yourself before you wreck yourself

word

urnotme said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Damfino said...

Deit - you need to become a contributor to the site... I sent you an invite... but I can send you another.

Also, you need an evil image to coincide with your name.

Kern said...

I kind of enjoyed the last thread a little more. This one has a little too much bile for me...

Damfino said...

Why am I not surprised at the double comment! Way to go sloppy joe.

And Queen B did not seem to thrilled with your post either... Krysta and Kern don't know you that well... they would be afraid.

Kern said...

By the way, what's up with all the admin removed comments? It seems like a big tease to me...

Damfino said...

HA - bile inducing posts. Lovin life on the Damfinoblog!

Damfino said...

I delete the double ups... it can get messy when the common folk start making comments.

Kern said...

Sloppy joe...that's kind of funny.

I'm sure Urnotme is a regular guy who just had a few different thoughts. I am quite sure it's not indicative of any sinister underlying behavioral problems.

I am also curious, who is the Queen B I've been seeing around?

QueenB said...

Im in the same room with him.. You would be scared too!

Kern said...

Queen B: Are you Urnotme's coworker?

QueenB said...

yes.

QueenB said...

yes.

Kern said...

Got it.

Kern said...

I'm starting to wonder if we should have a rollcall thread, as it seems our numbers are growing steadily. That way everyone knows who everyone is.

Unless that's lame. In which case it must have been some kind of strange momentary lapse that made me suggest it.

QueenB said...

"tell them you know the coolest guy that they know

they'll know right away"

urnotme said...

That's right

damfino- you don't want none

Damfino said...

urnotme... I am trying to understand your hick broken english... but unable to.

What do you mean by "you don't want none?"

Roll calls are lame... besides... I barely want to know any of you anyway.

Kern said...

Er...right. It was stupid...forget I mentioned it...

/runs away crying

urnotme said...

It means I'll break you down like a cheap tent punk. lol just joking.

My broken english is from trying to hurry. Not everyone has all day to do this. Luccckkkyyyy.


New thread time

urnotme said...

yeah that was pretty harsh

Damfino said...

SOMETIMES I MISS YOU SO MUCH I HURT INSIDE!!

Deit Heimley said...

Sorry to insult you Urnotme. Though a minor sarcastic insult was intended, I was not that serious about you disturbing line of thoughts.

I Personally worked at a call center so boring and mind numbing, I came up with elaborate schemes to kill people and argued about Batman with co-workers for days. And though I still hold my original strongly felt position on Batman, I was never to serious about the killing thing. At least most of the time.

As for being a regular contributor, I could do a book review section of the Damfinoblog, to counter the regular music reviews. I m a little behind on my reading though, so I am sad to say it will be a small bit of time before I can actually make much of a contribution.

urnotme said...

Can't we talk about Kenny Rogers and eating off of hookers asses?

since ya'll can't man up and agree that you have these thought processes too

urnotme said...

deit I was not offended... rather amused really... it's all in fun!


P.S. I'd rather have a review on the choir or something of the sort.

krysta jo said...

Going way back to the beginning - as I was walking to my horrendous lab session, I was wondering how much splatter there would be if you drove your car into a semi-truck head-on going 65 miles an hour. I have always been curious about that.

urnotme - are you sure you didn't grow up in the deep south??

urnotme said...

Awhhhhh Krysta Jo are you kidding me?

Talk about a burn.

krysta jo said...

You know I am just teasing. Sorry...I'll go back to sticking up for you and your broken English.

Damfino said...

HA!

Krysta supports and destroys at the same time!!

Kern said...

Where is the aforementioned discussion about Kenny Rogers and hookers that Urnotme suggested?