Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Kernwatch: October 2006

The other day as a postscript in one of his comments, The Sheriff had this to say:

"Kern......what is the book status?...we need a post here in Finoland."

Well, there have been many developments in Kern's literary and artistic endeavors, enough in fact, that I can actually do an list. If this were a film I would do a Scorcese style montage most likely set to "Gimme Shelter", but due to the unfortunate limits of this software, you'll have to imagine it while humming the Stones quietly to yourself.

First of all, the big news is that the book is now totally done, for better or worse. Those of you who would like to support my eventual descent into a Bukowski-esque spiral, can purchase a copy here. I'm hoping to scrape together enough dough to purchase the global distribution package so that it can then be marketed through such online booksellers as Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com among others, which would happen approximately six to eight weeks after I pay them the fee.

Also in book related news, there is a contest sponsored by the company that I publish through, Lulu.com, called the Blooker Prize. No, that's not a typo, that's their clever title for a contest where all of the books have been derived in some way, shape, or form from original blog content. I would say my book certainly fills the bill in that regard, and so I am going to throw pride and caution to the wind and enter my book into the running for the 2007 Blooker. I feel I have nothing to lose(what's dignity?) and the worst that can probably happen is that curious people might check out the book to see how it stacks up against its competition. Unfortunately, certain "celebrity" authors are also participating, which I am a more than a little displeased about. Jessica Cutler who published the book Washingtonienne last year, didn't officially enter last year because she didn't actually send a full copy of the book, which I suppose has been rectified this time around. I've looked at some of the competition and I don't know where I stand. Not because I feel mine is a paragon of literary excellence mind you, but moreso because the topics of a lot of them seem like kind of a bore to be honest. They all seem to either be hokey derivatives of Seven Habits Of Highly Effective Asskissers, tomes of pseudo-Thoreauian folksiness minus the deep insights, or your "run of the mill single gal in a modern man's world, whatever is she to do?"(See Dating Amy or Washingtonienne). Do I have a shot at the big money? Doubtful, but I'm doing it anyway. So f*** it.

Speaking of writing, I'm totally been engulfed by Tiny Mix Tapes recently. After a long absence while I was working on my book, I've come back to it with renewed vigor and dedication. I've had several reviews up in the last couple of months, bringing the total up to seven within this first year, though it will likely be eight by the end of the week. We've been doing a lot in the Delorean section, and I hope you guys will keep an eye out this week for a group article we did that I had a major hand in, as well as my review for our theme month in which I'll be covering No Wave predecessors Suicide's eponymous album from 1977. After that, I am sure we'll be hammering hard at our year end lists, which means I've got a lot going on with them through the end of the year.

Also, my other artistic endeavors have been put on hold for a while, but I am going to be contributing a t-shirt design to a company called Threadless. Essentially, Threadless is a fascinating experiment blending art and commerce with a populist spin. Artists submit designs, fans vote on the designs, and the winner gets a thousand bucks and their design made as a shirt.
I'm going to be contributing my "Hallowed Be Thy Game" design which you may have seen up here last year.

In addition to this, I'm hoping to do some painting again in the near future as I desperately miss it, and need a little respite from all the writing I'm doing.

In any case, that's what's really been consuming my time lately, and should account for the lack of blog entries over at my little corner of the blog world.

I just want to tell everyone here at the Damfinoblog thank you for all of your support. If it weren't for your encouragement and support, I don't know that I would have done half the things I have done in the last year, so it's all very appreciated.

Hugs and s**t,



Sheriff Officer Greg the Bunny said...

Now that is a fucking blog post.

Informative, engaging, with a hint of minty freshness.

Lots of activity in the Kern World.

Good luck in all your outlets Alex.

I will check out the book.


ps: so true, so true.....

Kern said...


It's been totally crazy lately, to be sure. I'm really hoping that I'm going to get a chance to do some painting pretty soon. It's the one creative endeavor I pursue that I don't feel pressured to be really good at, that I can just do for the sake of doing.

If you get a copy of the book, I promise that I will totally sign it the next time I see you, complete with any awful, disturbing, and depraved inscription you like.

Viva Filth, Viva Kern!